Thursday, July 21, 2011

5 Weeks In Love

Have you ever looked at someone and thought, "I love him so much it hurts?"

I feel that way with him every day.
All day.
Even when he's fussy and needs to be held and held and all around me chaos ensues.
I am so in love with this boy.

I remember the first time I felt that way about Aaron.
We were still dating.
Sitting in a bookstore in Del Mar, I looked at him across from me.
He was in front of a window with sunlight shining down on him, absorbed in some book.
Without warning, tears filled my eyes and I caught my breath.
I knew I could not live without him.
It was an overwhelming feeling.

Love is like that.
If fills you so full that sometimes you ache with it.

Right now I know nothing better than to feel the weight of my boy falling asleep on my chest.
His body grows heavier as his sleep does.
He breaths rapidly; those short, quick breaths and I feel his heart speed up.
His eyelids flutter.
And then he sighs.  
Asleep again.
And I am loathe to put him down.

But sometimes I do, just so that I can admire him.
And take one hundred pictures in a few minutes because I want to remember him just like this.
I want to revel in his chubby cheeks and big nose.
The rolls on his arms and the way he sucks his bottom lip in when he sleeps.
I want to soak him up.
I can't get enough.

He's already been with us 5 weeks.  
Almost 6, really.
We're all in love with him.
I can't keep his brothers and sisters away from him.
They're sure he's talking to them.  Almost saying words.
He watches them with wide eyes in those moments when he's awake.
Moments that are still far and few between but more now than before.

What joy he brings us all when he shows us his dimple and his smile.
There might be nothing better.
That first time he focused on my face and that sweet smile lit up his face I cried with the wonder of it.
I caught my breath.
It was an overwhelming feeling.

How glad I am for that moment in the bookstore so long ago that brought me to this moment.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11

I'm so glad you're here, Davy.
Love from,


katie said...

This post brought me back to those early days. It is such a beautiful time to experience with a new baby. The automatic bond and love between mommy and baby is beyond words. He is just perfect in every way and I'm so glad that your family is reveling in him.

lauren said...

yes... i remember this one moment i found this blog by a girl named greta via a sweet spread in er.. was it design sponge? apartment therapy? hmm.. i don't recall but it was a special moment. then i realized i liked just about everything on her blog and it was virtual love at first sight. so glad i found it. :)
congratulations on the babe and the moments of clarity when we see His plan of love enfold before us. :)

Jenny said...

I'm so glad you were able to put this love into words, Greta. It is sweet to read, it melts me. I remember when I first started to feel this way about Rob. I wanted to eat him up, so I could carry him around with me all the time. Crazy love. :)

Anonymous said...

Can I just say- I love your blog! It is so relatable to my life right now. I have FOUR boys and a little girl- actually she is the oldest at 6 years young. :) I have a William too and he is almost as fresh as your precious Davy- 8 weeks. I treasure those sweet moments with each one more and more. God is good! I also have begun homeschooling and love CM's philosphy. It feels natural. Blessings to you and keep up the inspiring posts!

Natalie C. said...

Sorry.. I forgot my name! That last post was from Natalie C. :)