Just Because

In the interest of full disclosure, I have to tell you that today I was in the valley.

Yesterday I was breathing the rarefied air of the mountain top.

The birds were singing, I was singing, the children were singing.

We could have been in The Sound of Music. (see here)

But not today, my friends, not today.

It's not good when you wake up to a 3 year old in your bed and you don't even remember how he got there. It's not good when you nurse the baby you are trying to wean, even though she didn't ask for it, because you so desperately want to go back to sleep and you know that is the fastest way. It's not good when all 3 kids wake up in the night.

All 3? I mean, really.

And there were ants today. Lots and lots of them. I eventually gave up trying to stop them so there was a parade of ants across my kitchen floor all day.

It rained all afternoon. Again.

Lilly napped for 15 minutes on the way home from church this morning.

And that was it.

I tired to nap on the couch while she read books in her crib.

It only worked for about 15 minutes.

I didn't feel like reading to them. I just wanted to sleep. Not build a fort. Not make cookies. Not be a good mommy doing fun, rainy day activities.

It was a low day.

And they were actually very good. It was me. I think I might need a day off. (Aaron, are you reading this?) It's been a while.

So this post isn't what I'd planned, but here it is. Here I am. Just trying to be real. There are mountain top days and valley floor days. Tomorrow will be better.

But here are these pictures of this sweet and lovely little girl. I took them last week when the sun was shining and she was lost in a book.

Did I mention I am weaning her? It makes me want to cry. And it makes me want to remember her just like this.

My little Lillian.

O how I do love her.